It was at this point as her husband shouted this, she realised that all the judges were wearing wigs! This served to relieve the pressure she was feeling until she realised as her brain started to work that they only wore wigs on serious trails like murder ones. So, she was a murderer!
Again Shaz had to drag her paranoid thoughts away when she heard her lawyer shout out in Ben's direction."Get back in that box before you ruin everything!" Followed by the judge banging his hammer down and yelling, "I will have order in this court! You there! Get back in that witness box and you..." Pointing to their lawyer, "Stop making a scene, let go of the man!" The lawyer was actually trying to stop Ben from getting any closer to the judge.
Sharon had to restore order, "Ben get back in here now! And Mr Pritchard let him go!"
Both men looked at her and started to say, "But, but.."
"No buts just do it."
Ben got back into the box while Pritchard sat behind his desk.
The judge now satisfied that order was restored spoke again, "Mr Dire. This is a standard question that I have to ask. I was not calling your wife a prostitute.” Once again fixing them with his patented hard stare he voiced more woe, “ I will not tolerate this sort of behaviour in my courtroom. If you make another outburst like the last one I will find you in contempt of court and will fine you accordingly. Do I make myself clear?"
"I suppose so."
He was still stewing, so Sharon gave him a real hard dig in the ribs.
"Ouch! I mean yes your honour."
"And one more thing, take those stupid glasses off. I like to see who I am talking too."
Oops! He had little choice but to remove his glasses and reveal to the whole courtroom his black eye. The room suddenly filled with gasps of shock, followed by whispers including the judge and that other man again.
"Judge Emerson, this man is perfect for us!"
"Why? Because he is sporting a black eye?" The judge replied with a hint of sarcasm.
The other looked at him wide eyed before explaining the obvious, "No, because he is out spoken, not afraid to look his audience in the eye and tell them what needs to be said."
Emerson chewed it over before recapping on what Grimm was saying, "So Mr Grimm you are saying that this man standing before us would be the ideal candidate for the forth coming Shop Workers meeting."
Grimm felt he had struck gold "Yes. He's new to the place and with his clear crisp voice he would be an ideal speaker."
It was good, but there was one snag. "Has he signed up with the union?"
Grimm was one step ahead as he had already thought of this. "No sir, but you could order him to."
"Ah!" The light dawned on the judge. "Mr Dire, just how did you get that black eye?"
Here came the most obvious next question of the preceding. Ben would have to tell the truth. "Well your honour, you see my wife gave it to me. You see I was........."
Sharon butted in with, "He was in my way and I didn't see him, I accidentally hit him with my elbow."
"Elbow!" The judge said all surprised. "No. I don't believe this to be the true story. Now I put you under oath Mr Dire to tell this court the truth!"
Both Sharon and Ben looked at each other before he decided he had little choice. "Okay your honourable one. I was surrounded by six men in ninja suits. They wanted my wallet, I said 'no', they said, 'yes'. So I said, 'Do you want a fight about it?' They said 'yes!' So I gave them one using the knowledge of watching all those kung fu films of the seventies. I had also learnt how to walk on rice paper without leaving a mark and holding large red hot containers. I also become skilled at how to use a bamboo cane. Anyway you know how Ninja's attack! The first I waked him in the goo.. ur, lower area before knocking him out with a kick to the head. The second one knocked my cane from out of my hands, so I crowned him over the head with my large hot pot. The third fell over the second lying on the floor and I knocked this one out with my smelly feet from wearing those ninja ballyshoes all the time. The forth I did away with a swift karate chop to the neck, the fifth decided to run for it which left me with the last one and the ugliest and tallest of them all. He showed off by giving me a ten minute demonstration of his mortal combat skills before going into combat. After ten minutes of fighting which included flying through the air and jumping up and down ten foot walls, or if you are running in metric about three metres I got sloppy and that’s when he landed me with a right hook to the eye. I felt a little dazed when hitting the dirt. Then making a quick getaway I unrolled my rice paper and ran along it to the other side. My opponent laughed at me before walking rather heavily over it making all sorts of dents. When he was halfway over he made his mistake, he cracked the paper and in doing so fell through it and down a rather large manhole. I never saw him again and I learned a powerful lesson. The bigger you are the harder you fall through rice paper covering manholes!" He finished his presentation of lies by bowing low to the judge and cracking his forehead on the witness box.
"Judge! He is the one for our meetings."
"Yes Grimm he is."
Shaz was having kittens, after what an obvious lie! She noted that her lawyer was packing up his case and shaking his head in resignation.
The judge after finishing another lesson in how to whisper announced... "Mr and Mrs Dire I will grant you a licence on one condition."
"What condition your judge, honour?" Ben asked as he rubbed his sore head.
"The condition is that you agree to sign up for the shop workers union and you Mr Dire will be chief speaker at the next meeting."
"What me?" he wanted to laugh at them.
"Yes you!" Grimm replied backing Emerson up.
"Well I don't know," Ben was saying.
Sharon couldn't believe it! Against all odds they were getting this licence and now her husband was in the process of throwing it away? Wrapping her hand around his mouth she shouted, "Yes your honour, he will do it."
Yes reeled in and caught! "Very well I grant you a liquor licence, court dismissed."
With a clap of the hammer Sharon had her licence and her husband joined the shop workers union and would be chief speaker for their next meeting to the obvious delight of the judge and his monkey boy. She learned another valuable lesson; that is that not all judges could tell the truth from fiction even if it came up and tugged at their wigs.

 

OH BURGER....YOU TRICKED ME!

Clive and Bernard were in the van, everything was going real fine until it started to pour down with rain with loud claps of thunder ringing out and echoing off the buildings close by. There Bernard stood looking out of the service hatch window watching the rain running from off the canopy. "Oh great, its raining so hard now that I can't even see Big Ben."
Clive sat on a deck chair reading a daily tabloid, "Big deal man! Its only a gigantic grand father clock!"
Bernard raised his eyebrows before protesting, "How can you say that? This clock is a part of our history."
"Yeah, and its history that we should forget. Especially the type of history that sits in parliament, the I'm all right jacks who are only interested in lining their own pockets and to hell with the poor man who is out of work and can't even find a place to lay his head for the night. In fact its a damn shame old Guy Faulkes didn't blow that place sky high! Even Gloria would agree with me on that."
Bernard could see his point about the poor, "Yeah I get your point about the poor. But as for blowing that place sky high would accomplish very little because sooner rather than later the new government would build a new houses of parliament which would soon be adopted by the nation as another great monument." Then something fell into his mind, "Hey Clive! Who is Gloria?"
The guy went all watery eyed as these words seemed to spill from his mouth, "Gloria was my best friends wife. Sadly he passed away and I had the job of comforting her. I did my best to look after her, at the time I was working at a club as a pianist. But all too soon I let a little thing called drink take hold of me to get me over the loss of my buddy. Anyway cut a long story short we became very close, lovers. We talked about the future and we decided to give it a while to allow us time to think things through, making sure it wasn't just circumstances throwing us together. So I carried on playing and drinking more and more until I couldn't play no more."
"What? The drink got to your hands?"
"No man! The club closed and I lost my job, lost my home and all the time I allowed the drink to speak for me, give me courage to cope. In the end Gloria couldn't live with me no more, not with the new love of my life, whiskey."
The rain hit hard on the steel roof of the van as if to help fill the space where words should have been to express the grief Clive felt every time he relived his one big mistake.
"Do you still love her?" Bernard asked feeling as sad as the weather.
Clive felt the pain and replied irritably, "What do you think?"
"Well, if you do, then fight the booze and win her back."
"I doubt if I could."
"If you give into doubt then you can never win."
"You want me to give up drinking in the vain attempt to win back the only woman I have ever loved?"
"Only if you want a second chance to bring back happiness by getting Gloria back. After all, by what you said she must still be single and probably in love with you. And you are the only one who can change this scenario."
Clive thought this through. Then breaking the sombre mood which had cast a shadow over his afternoon like this rain storm had done for the city, he clapped his hands, stood up and said, "Not much point in hanging around here. Lets pack up and head for home, not unless you want to get lost around Piccadilly Circus?"
"Ah, no. Home will do after this con of a tour of London. Hey Clive, fancy a tour of London? Yeah a tour of London in a burger van!"
So the big guy was still holding a grudge over the slight twist of the truth. "Sorry man, I'll never lie to you again okay?"
Bernard held his gaze a little longer before agreeing, "Okay, lets get back home."
It was at this point Clive found something weird, "Hey, isn't it funny that we call two small rented rooms home, after all we’re really far from home?"
Bernard smirked, "I suppose it is. Come I'll close up back here and you get the van started."
Clive saluted before running out into the rain and round to the front. When sitting down and sliding the key into the ignition he looked into the passenger side wing mirror to watch big Bernard pull down the canopy and instantly drench himself with all the water that had collected on the canvass. Now chuckling a little he started up the van.

 

AFTER EIGHT?

The evening came round fast and as a treat all were allowed to have pizza's. After the washing up was completed all were settled into the comfy chairs. Bernard was sat in one of the chairs, or was it on the sofa? One just can't tell with a man of his size. Sharon was fiddling around hanging and then re-hanging pictures or re-arranging the ornaments, the last possessions of a past that had been in storage for a month or so. Each piece hung or placed came out with its own special memory of her parents. To wipe away the small pain in her heart she turned round to her husband who was playing cards with Clive and said; "I think I should pop round and tell Gordon the good news and then go onto to Auntie's to tell her. Do you want to come along?"
Ben gave her a look, "Ah, no thanks, my body couldn't cope with another alcohol assault."
Clive looked up, "not for me either, I prefer whisky to wine."
Her offer wasn't extended to Clive, still what did it matter they weren't going. "Fine, you two stay here. I'll be back by ten." She had softened the last part of that sentence so as to make it sound like a request rather then a statement. After all she knew all too well that she had a habit of being bossy.
Ben looked at her feeling a little sad that she wanted to go out. But now they had virtually adopted a family maybe a little time to one's self driving around was what she wanted, not him jabbering on about old times or something. Still they had shared a rare afternoon together shopping at Covent Garden. They had to make the most of that for he knew there would be few opportunities when his wife's dream of a coffee shop or restaurant or whatever became a reality. "That’s okay, you go, I'll stay and watch the children." he gave her a broad innocent smile.
She reciprocated by adding’s a kiss to her husband forehead. Collecting the car keys she left.
As soon as the door closed all went quiet apart from the loud snoring coming from Bernard who looked like a beached whale lying on that sofa. Ben looked at Clive to find that he was looking straight back at him, "Fancy a drink down the pub?"
Clive smiled, "You bet buddy!"
"Best hurry! We've only got a couple of hours serious drinking time."

 

CROSSED SWORDS AT THE SKULL AND CROSS BONES!

 

Walking in to the Skull and Crossbones and making your way over to the bar you find the landlord Dave listening in to a conversation being conducted between a well spoken chap and a Jamaican man with a large black beard, all dressed in black and holding a thick book. The other is in a blue pin striped suit and Dave is in his pirates uniform as per usual trying to keep the image of the pub alive.
The blond man continues with this conversation, "Equality among the sexes? Yeah right! I'm an air steward, and on our last flight there was a punch up between three drunk men. Instead of the women sorting it out they said I had to! So muggings here did it and the only reason why the women wouldn't do it was because I am a man! Now that’s sexism for you!" he almost shouted while pointing a finger to the man in black.
The man in black answered back, "I don't agree. These women were smart, not sexist. They were using the self preservation method; in other words you get beaten up while they get to stay all pretty looking with out a single scratch on their faces. Now that's what I call cleaver thinking!"
The blonde chap was clearly upset by this weird piece of thinking, so turning to Dave he asked, "What do you think?"
"Well me matey, I'll have to go with me main man here on that one."
He wasn't satisfied with that answer and voiced his opinions, "Suit yourselves! I still think its sexism." With a large huff and a puff he walked away.
Talking about walking, in came Clive and Ben. Dave shouted and waved like a child upon spying them through his mock telescope, "Ahoy me ship faring matey's!"
The man in black turned round, "Hello Clive!"
Clive in turn tugged at his friends arm and muttered, "Watch out for this man here, every opportunity he gets he will bash you with his favourite saying which is ‘I've got a scripture about that!’ and no matter what the subject is about he will find a way to bash you with his bible."
Ben's eyes widened with a kind of fear, "Does he now?"
Clive never replied for he had already started the introductions, "Hello Raymond, this is Ben my boss."
Raymond shook Ben's hand fervently before asking, "Clive did you say you have a job?"
"And a place to live!" Ben added.
Dave butted in with, "you ain’t given Clive a job? What a brave move! I think this causes for a celebration of whiskeys on me!"
They all cheered except Raymond who had just witnessed one blast from the past coming into their lives again, well he and Clive's! "Look Clive, it's Gloria."
The group turned to stare at a beautiful looking woman of early forties with an olive reflection and very dark brown eyes, the type you could lose yourself in. She was a petite woman with a lot of grace, one felt she had the moves of a ballet dancer.
When Clive spoke up, it was in a sigh or one of mournful dejection, "Yeah, that's my, um, that is Gloria."
“Why don’t you go and talk to her?” Ben asked as he eyed both parties up.
“You know full well why she won’t.”
“Aha, I remember. It’s to do with the drink problem me mateys. He likes to take it in faster than a ship with a gaping big hole in it’s side. Come to think of it, he sinks just as quick into the mire of despair. That is where he will stay stuck until he can be rescued by the lifeboat of common sense.” Dave added.
Ben felt impressed at the way this barman used his hands emphatically to illustrate a sinking boat stuck in the mire of what’s it, um, thingy. Anyway he was equally surprised that Clive got the point.
“You are saying that if I give up the drink, I have a good chance of getting her back?”
“Aye, that be me point.”
“In fact, talking about wine and ships I have a scripture about that! Now let me find it.”
“Oh no, not the bible again.”
Ben noted Clive’s protests, “Clive shut it and listen. If it is of help then listen and learn, if it ain’t then take it and leave.”
Raymond raised his eyes to look at this very white man, “that in it’s self is almost a proverb my friend. But this is a real one from the wise old king called Solomon in chapter twenty three verses thirty through to thirty five.”
“Do we all have to suffer?” Clive moaned.
Ben frowned at the lack of patience and understanding, “Yes we do.”
Raymond wasn’t going to be put off as he began, “It says; those staying a long time with the wine, those coming into search out mixed wine.” He looked up at this point, “which means whiskey and other drinks of the alcoholic kind,” before looking back down at the verse he was reading. “Do not look at it when it exhibit’s a red colour, when it gives off it’s sparkle in the cup, when it goes with a slickness. At its end it bites just like a serpent and it secretes poison just like a viper. Your own eyes will see strange things and your own heart will speak perverse things. You will even be like a man lying down at the top of a mast. They have struck me, but I did not become sick, they have smitten me but I did not know it. When I shall wake up? I shall seek it yet some more.” With this said Raymond closed his hardback bible with a sharp action making a gunshot sound with it making all jump. “So you can free yourself of this poison!” Raymond added as he tapped Clive’s whiskey glass with disdain.
Clive took a look at his glass before pushing it over to Dave’s side, “you had better put it back and give me one of those alcoholic free things you call a beer.”
Dave pulled a proud father look at Clive before saying, “right on me brave matey.”
“So, you are giving up, just like that?” Ben asked not sure if you could or not.
“Well, yeah. If I can win Gloria back than that will be the best reward I can imagine.”
“Why don’t you tell her that.”
“I haven’t the courage,” Clive replied as he eyed up his long lost love before looking back at Ben.
“Here, take this whiskey here and that will give you the bottle!” Ben offered as he handed Clive one glass full of whiskey.
“Yeah, that will!” Clive lifted the glass and knocked the contents back finding the courage to say... “oh no! What have I done? You idiot!”
Ben looked at the glass, at Clive, then back again before it hit the thick idiot. He swallowed hard before saying, “Oops! You will give up after that last one I kind of forced you to take by mistake.”
“How can I tell Gloria I’m giving up the booze, if I just knocked a whole glass of the serpents poison down.”
“Well man, do as the white bloke says and start from now. You are doing it for her, because you love her.”
“Yes Clive, tell her you love her.”
“I can’t.”
“No bro, you can.” Raymond placed his warm hands upon this abandoned soul and as he did he took them off quickly as something had come to his mind. “I have a scripture about that somewhere.”
With the threat of another scripture from the big ‘B’, Clive knew he had to get going before he was bible bashed again. So, by talking to Gloria would avoid the need to listen to anything else Raymond was saying. Slipping off from the stool he walked over and stood waiting to be noticed by the lady. Suddenly she looked up and he thought he could see that old sparkle in her eyes, soon to be removed upon seeing him. The parting still hurt her, he could tell.
“Hello Gloria,” was all that fell out from his mouth.
“Hello Clive, you must have got your courage up by drinking. You must get drunk to want to come over here and speak to me.”
“No…I’ve just had the one glass of whiskey…actually I’m giving it up.”
Gloria laughed at him before saying, “oh yeah, giving it up for what?”
Clive swallowed hard before giving two simple words, “for you.”
Her mouth fell open and for a second the ridicule was gone. “Why?”
“Because I still love you and want you back.” There, he had said it and felt the better for it. But before he could say anymore there was a commotion at the entrance of the public house.

In came six big looking men all wearing black with dark sunglasses. Clive knew in an instant who they were as a skinny looking half-Chinese chap walked in the middle of a gaggle of big built bodyguards. He was in his twenties, a rather ruthless individual as he had to be, being the number two guy in this part of London’s mafia movement. There are many segment or should we say Mafia organisations. Sometimes they work together, other times they fight till the death. It was a lot like two Bull Elephants fighting over the females. Sometimes they would cooperate and other times a massive fight would ensue until one lost the day. Clive watched as this cocky looking young man strolled up to the bar just where his friends were.
Dave started to shake with fear as he knew exactly why they were making a house call. “Ah, aye, um, hello, what can I get you gents?”
“Just the money you owe us,” replied the half-Chinese guy.
“Ah, the money. Well you see…”
“No excuses. My boss wants the money.”
“What money?” Ben asked.
“I wasn’t talking to you punk.”
Ben took half a step backwards as he boldly replied, “actually the name’s Ben.”
Chang the mafia man eyed him up and down before deciding to enlighten the dude on what is going down. “Well Ben, this landlord owes us back pay on protecting him”
“Ah I see! A kind of bodyguard revolt?”
“No man! Are you thick of someth’n?”
“Actually I have a scripture about that!” piped up Raymond only for him to be shouted down with, “shut up!” from all around.
“Look dude, we are paid to protect all the properties in this area and for this protection we demand a small fee.”
“You protect properties from suspected trouble, like a neighbourhood watch where all has to chip in to pay for baseball bats, guns, knives and other violent items.”
Chang eyed the smaller guy up and down once more before deciding that he wasn’t worth the time. So addressing the owner of this stupid maritime bar he continued, “Look barman just give us the cash, or we will just have to take our cut from your nice bar and unique scenery.”
Dave swallowed hard as his nerves were getting the better of him, he replied, “I can’t pay all of it...I only can manage half. All the bills have piled up and if I pay you I can’t afford to pay for the beer and without beer my customers go else where, then I have to close and you won’t get a penny when I’m gone.”
The mafia man sighed as patience wasn’t his strongest asset, “you’ll be gone in a sec if you won’t pay what you owe my boss.”
“Just how much does he owe?”
“Just stay out of this shorty,” Chang replied pointing a finger so close to Ben’s face that the he went boss eyed.
“I think I have a right to know as I am a resident of this area.”
Chang raised an eyebrow, “oh yeah, where?”
“Just up the road, the one that has the doors hanging off and is in need of total refurbishment.”
“The old restaurant. Best sign up for protection then.”
“No thanks, don’t need any.”
At this the mafia man laughed along with all his heavies, “ha ha, you will sooner rather than later.”
This didn’t make Ben feel any more relaxed, though it didn’t stop him from going back to the original question, “we were discussing just how much Dave owes.”
“Lean forward and I will tell you.”
“How much!” Ben replied as he received the rather big sum.
“Yeah, that is how much we are going to enjoy damaging this joint eh lads?” Again all the heavies laughed and it was here that Ben noticed that most of them were of mixed races, not predominantly Chinese. In an instant the leader called out to all, “I think it is closing time, all had best leave.”
Many took the hint and started to disappear into the evening, until one small man yelled out, “friends there is no need to leave!”
The Chinese man turned, with fire in his eyes and a knife to the guy’s throat he yelled at him, “Will you stop butting in! If you speak another word I will…” he was stopped as one cheque came up in front of his eyes.
“Is a cheque okay?” Ben said as he dared only to say these few words as the blade felt it may cut any second now. Just as fast as the knife being there, it disappeared.
Chang felt astonished, “you are going to pay up for him?”
“Yeah, friends stick together.”
Chang took the cheque, “That’s fine providing it ain’t made of rubber and don’t come bouncing along to come back in your face.”
“It ain’t made of rubber, but proper cold hard cash.”
Chang took this moment to leave, then just as he was at the exit he addressed this slightly shorter man, “So Ben. Are you sure your place don’t need protecting?”
“Quite sure.”
“I will pay you a visit in a couple of days, to see if you have changed your mind.”
“You are more than welcome to come round and see how far we have got and to see how our restaurant will work.”
“You know, I’ve always wanted to see how it all works.”
“You know where to come then.”
Chang grinned, “Oh and one thing.”
“Yes.”
“What construction company are you having do all your work?”
“J.M.Construction.” Then Ben asked, “Can you just tell me something?”
“What.”
“Just your name.”
“Chang.” He pulled a half-smile at the other before walking into the cool evening air.
The public house was as silent as the grave for a while before one person started to talk, then another and soon all were back to their lives. It was Dave out of the group who found the voice to speak, “Ben I can’t believe you have just paid them off. I’ll pay you back I promise.”
“Just forget it. As I have already stated, that is what friends are for. All I ask is that you try to not get into debt like that with them again.”
Dave sighed, “I wish I could, but they keep on changing the protection rates.”
“Well you know there is a scripture that says there is more happiness in giving than receiving, so how much do I get?” Raymond butted in as he held his hand out.
“Get real! I ain’t that generous.”
“Are we going now?” Clive asked as he came up to the group.
“Yes, better get back before Shaz finds out. See you later guys.”
After Dave had thanked him a hundred times, Ben finally managed to get out of there.

Sharon had told Gordon about the good news and he had clapped his hands together in delight. Now Sharon was at her auntie’s as she pressed the intercom button and after a few moments a voice called out, “Yes, who is it?”
“Hi auntie it’s Sharon.”
“Who?”
“Sharon who was here last night with my husband Ben.”
“Oh yes, come on in.”
Buzz went the buzzer to unlock the door, only of course the chain was on again. Sharon buzzed the intercom once again.
“Yes, who is it?”
After looking up to the heavens and sighing Shaz started all over again.

Ben laid there in bed wondering about tonight and wondering if he should tell his wife or not. Still the least she knew the better. Sharon was next to him fast asleep. She had got in later than expected as she had to wait a long time outside her auntie’s flat, thirty five minutes before she finally got in. Her auntie and uncle were not Sharon’s actual blood relations. Sadly for Sharon all her real family had laid down to rest and she is the only survivor. She had a sad life, she was only seven when she lost her sister in a riding accident. At twenty one she found out that her mother had cancer and twenty three when she died. Then her father found out he had cancer and had passed away by the time she was twenty five. It came as to no surprise to Ben that she had gone off the rails a bit before he came along and managed to get her back on track. It came also as to no surprise that she had sold the family estate; after all the place would only bring back bad memories every time she visited it. He also went on to think about just how fortunate he had been and very honoured to be the only man to be given the chance by Shaz to be trusted enough to become her husband. This is still in his view the biggest compliment ever made to him in his life. He always wanted to pay it back, but money wise he couldn’t. Carrying on the family line, something that she could look on and say that this was hers. Something like a baby?
Yes! A baby. Sharon could love it and be the perfect gift to her and a compliment of her, especially if it turned out to be a little girl with her mother’s eyes and yes that smile. That smile she gave could melt the hardest of hearts. Sharon is a very beautiful woman with her ash blonde hair shimmering in the summer sun, her dark eyes penetrating your very soul and not to mention her elegant figure; not too slim yet not too fat, oh and those prominent cheek bones! Now if her daughter had all this to her advantage she would never want for admirers.
Ben turned and tapped his wife on her shoulder, “Shaz are you awake?” He got no reply. So he tried again to little avail. This time he decided to give her a little push not realising that his wife was right on the edge of the bed and out she fell with a thud to the floor.
“Ahh! What the hell happened, one minute I was fast asleep dreaming of waterfalls, the next I’m pushed over one.”
Ben panicked, “ah sorry.”
Sharon picked herself up and fumbled for the light. After finding the switch she flinched at the brightness of the sixty watt sun. After rubbing her eyes she spoke, “that’s the first time I’ve fallen out of bed since I was about six I think.”
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah fine, just a little shocked.”
“Can we talk?”
“What about?”
“About our family line.”
“Isn’t that a little too heavy for three in the morning,” Sharon replied as she pointed to where the clock told the time as it sat on the dressing table.
“Not about our past, but the future.”
Shaz felt suddenly more alert as she asked, “the future?”
“As in who will come after us.”
“No one.”
“Exactly.”
This was a little too much of a quiz, then as she ran through the late night quiz her eyes widened as the final haze of sleep cleared. “Ah, you want children.”
“Just the one so we can carry on the family line.”
“Your family line.”
Ben shifted his pillow as he muttered, “not mine exactly, but yours.”
“Why?”
Time for expression of thought and no time to get tongue tied. “Because there is only one of you and well I would like the world to have another of you. After all the world would sadly miss you when you are gone and the maggots have eaten you away. But with another one of you about, then the world could see and appreciate exactly what I appreciate and that is you; just how pretty, loving and kind and beautiful you are.”
Sharon sat down on the edge of the bed. “This is not about children. You want me to have a wax figure of myself in the island’s wax-works museum so that all the tourists can see a form of me after I am dead and buried. Why not just get me stuffed?”
Ben felt annoyance at her interpretation of events and took offence at the stuffed comment. “No. I want a daughter who could be just like her mother.”
“Oh I see,” Shaz replied as she got back into bed. “You know just how much looking after they take. You get very little sleep and as they get older they get more and more of a handful until one day find boys, get pregnant and trouble starts all over again. We as newfound grandparents are left holding the baby while our daughter goes out and does it all again. Is that what you really want?”
Ben became aware of he had barked up the wrong tree and found a viper lurking which had just come out and bitten him. He thought through his reply, “Sharon dear, if we train up our baby the right way with the correct balance of love and discipline then it will be a better chance of our child turning out okay. This could be the best and happiest time of our lives.”
Sharon could see what Ben was getting at. If he wanted a child so much he was going to have to understand exactly what child rearing means. He will have to go and be a parent to babies, toddlers and children.
“Okay I will think about your proposal on one condition.”
“What’s that?”
“That you come down to the local toddlers club and spend a morning with the babies there.”
“What a good idea! “Okay deal!”

Next morning Sharon took Ben down to the local baby club and was allowed to handle the babies. One was sick over him and all he did was call out with pleasure... “Hey Shaz isn’t this great! This one has just emptied it’s stomach all over me!”
He was allowed to feed them, put them to bed and change their nappies. He did pull a face at the smell especially when he put his hands in a runny pooh. One baby went for a number one over his shirt and being a boy managed to aim a good shot to score a jackpot in the mouth. Again all her husband could say was, “this one’s just pee’d all over me and it tastes like, well, lime juice cordial!”
Later on he was run over by a push chair and had a child who wouldn’t stop crying. All in all he was determined to prove to his wife that he would make a good father. Of course, the burning question is; would she?”

When they arrived back after a busy morning she found it to be quiet, very quiet. Sharon thought the builders had broken up early today. She was wrong, very wrong as they hadn’t turned up at all.
Gordon was pacing up and down the path outside the back door. He was dressed today in a bright green suit with a white shirt, green and white spotted tie along with white socks and green shoes. To complete the effect he was wearing matching green glasses with mirror lenses.
“Oh dear, oh dear luvvies, it’s bad news, very bad news!”
“What is?” Though Sharon knew what the answer would be.
“The builders have not turned up,” He replied as he waved his arms up and down looking like a chicken trying to take off and fly.
“I can see that.”
“It’s the mafia, they have taken them, told them not to turn up.”
“How?”
“They run things around here and they run what you can only call as a forced builders union. This union has voted to go on strike.”
Ben stood a quiet spectator until the truth dawned upon him. “Oh dear. I wondered why Chang asked me that question.” He sat down on the patio wall and before his wife could ask him to elaborate he did. “Last night Clive and I went to the local pub.”
“You did? What after saying about getting drunk.”
“Sharon please let me finish!” This was said in a rather stressed cutting sharp tone. He had to get this out before he was found quilty. “It was there, Dave the landlord got into trouble because he owed the mafia a couple of thousand back pay and couldn’t pay it. So I stepped in and paid the bill.”
“You did what?”
“I paid up for him, it was either that or they took it out on the pub’s décor and worst of all, Dave.” Ben flinched just waiting for a clip round the head and her to blow up like a stick of dynamite, but no.
“You did the right thing. Gordon can’t we offer the builders more money, or maybe a big cash incentive so they come back and complete the work? Like a few grand each.”
Gordon was still pacing up and down but he stopped briefly to reply, “Sharon love, I have already tried. I even rang round other companies. They won’t come because of the strong grip the mafia have in this area. Outside contractors will have their equipment vandalised and builders will be shown the door. The police cannot help much except increase patrols. I’ve tried all morning and come back to square one.”
Silence fell for a few minutes, all that could be heard was the sound of local traffic and a solitary blackbird singing into the summer air. All sat down on the patio wall trying to find a solution. Defeat only came their way.
“The only thing to do is to pay the mafia what they want.”
Everyone agreed. Sharon took Gordon off to survey the work completed on the club and what required the up most attention. Clive came back and collected a dejected Ben and soon their little van sat outside a building site that they had visited earlier when business started to pick up. Today the site was almost empty, apart from a few people working. Undaunted they set up shop and waited for the lunch whistle which came about one. No one came.
“That is strange.” Clive mumbled.
“I can only agree. Hey, hold on someone is coming.” Ben said eagerly as he addressed the chap, “what can I get you?”
The man had a badge on his left pocket which indicated that he was a person in authority. “Do me a burger with fried egg, chips and a coffee please.”
“Sure!” Ben nodded to his buddy who went to work. “Why are you so quiet? Near completion?”
“No. We have a sickness problem. Must be a flu bug or some’in. Everyone was fine last week, this week all ill. Except the guys who always bring in their own pack lunches. The doc suggests it could be food poisoning, where they all get that from I don’t know?”
“Um, no, strange that,” Ben answered as he suddenly went all wide eyed.
Clive saddled up to Ben as he handed over the coffee, “wasn’t that about the time we first visited this place.”
“Shh! Yeah, now get into the front, get us the hell out of here.”
Clive slipped out the back door and went round the front, started the van as his buddy made some loud banging of cans to muffle the noise.
“How long will my food take?”
“Oh not long, then again it may take longer than expected. Why don’t you have your coffee and admire your building work.” The man grinned and took his coffee and turned to admire the construction. By the time he went to place his coffee onto the small counter the van was history. Ben joined Clive up the front and found the guy to be a little rattled.
“Man, next time you cook the chips and I will do the meat!”
“Okay buddy, whatever you say.”
Actually nothing else was said until they reached another destination where Clive cooked all the meat and Ben did the drinks.

THE MEETING, THE UNINVITED GUEST AND THE FLORA.

 

Bang, bang, bang, went the door as the sound echoed up through the new hallway and up the stairs to where Sharon, Gordon and Bernard were sitting.
“There here!”
“I know that Gordy, but do I let them in? They might smash the place up.”
Bernard spoke up from behind them, “If they were going to smash the place up I would hardly think they would knock first.”
Sharon turned to nod in agreement, “good point.” Her nerves were beginning to sever. Where was her husband when she needed him? Oh, yes out working with Clive. Then with little choice she went downstairs and was just about to unlock one of the two big wooden doors when a voice called out in annoyance, “Why don’t they answer?”
Chang looked at this lump, “Because they probably ain’t in stupid!”
Sharon opened up the door to be faced with a half looking Chinese man with four big built bodyguards. Mustering up the courage she spoke, “you must be Chang and these must be your monkey boys I presume.”
Before Chang could utter a single word one of his men asked, “what’s a monkey boy?” The others who also wore blank expressions just muttered they hadn’t a clue. Chang raised a single hand to cut them off with, “Quiet! I will do all the talking and thinking for all of us.” Now addressing this woman he said, “you must be Sharon, owner of this joint.”
“That’s correct,” again a small waver fell over her voice as she spoke.
Chang looked behind her asking, “Who’s the poof in the green suit and the sumo wrestler?”
Gordon yelled out, “I’m no poofter you…” he wasn’t allowed to utter another word as Bernard placed one large hand over his mouth.
“Actually he is our, Sharon’s architect and interior designer extraordinaire. I am just a paying guest of this establishment.”
Chang nodded with half interest before addressing Sharon, “Can we come in, or shall we do business outside in the open street?”
“You can come inside for a few minutes.”

In they came. Chang took a look around him and to his left he observed a few obscure paintings hanging upon the wall. To his right was a little archway leading off to some stairs and as he faced the hallway, to his right was a cloakroom. It was one of those posh ones where you ring a brass bell and a person collects your jacket and gives you a number affair. A bit further beyond the cloakroom was a wide hallway which possessed a discrete sign which mentioned toilets and another which was still covered over. Directly ahead of him stood two big doors.
“What’s behind those doors?”
“Our restaurant.”
“Can I take a look?”
Shaz was taken a little aback. She could see the look of curiosity in his eyes. She was going to protest then decided not to, after all she might get duffed up if she refused.
“Sure allow me.”
The lady of this establishment opened up the double doors and flicked a light panel on her left, this was when the whole place came to life. Chang felt gob smacked at the sheer size of this room! There was rows upon rows of tables all decked out. As he walked down the middle he found he was walking towards a very large stage.
“You going to have plays here?”
“We thought of comedians, singers and if this place is exclusive enough, a theatrical performance or two.”
Chang nodded as he understood. He walked up the small flight of steps at the front until you were on the stage. Looking about you, you could see a very large bar all decked out with dark stained wood of some kind. No fittings just yet and then again you didn’t need an active mind to picture it finished in it’s glory. This was to his left. To the right sat the most spectacular sight that could possibly greet his tired eyes; a big waterfall coming from the ceiling and splashing down to a massive padding of rocks and water with other smaller falls trickling down rocks all gradually fanning down to the large pool area or base. Around the fall stood masses of green plant life, various exotic vegetation, some colourful and others just plain pretty. In fact each corner that looked to be of no use had a mini fall. The only area that didn’t have one was where there was an entrance for another set of toilets which ran parallel with the stage on his left and on his right another set of double doors.
With his mouth feeling as if it was open wide he stepped down from the stage and without a word he made it round to the double doors and through them. Here was the heart of operations, the kitchen. Sadly to his chagrin it was unfinished.
“Why ain’t it complete?”
“Because ducky, your boss pulled the plug,” Gordon piped up as he looked through those bright green glasses which reflected the mirrored face of the guy who had asked that dumb question in his mind.
“That is why we have your money, so we can get on and finish my project.”
Chang looked at them both before saying, “I see.” He felt like a child again, being that boy who wanted to see a model of a large American truck built to completion. This was one his brother had started to build, everyday he would come home from school and watch as his brother put it together. First was the chassis, glued and painted, then the wheels and so forth. As weeks went by his brother came to completion with just a few finishing touches. Chang remembered running home from school that day full of excitement at viewing the finished vehicle. Running home, through the front door and into the room he shared with his brother he found it…Smashed! Ruined by his drunken father who now laid fast asleep on his brother’s bed. Chang’s brother was only ten at the time and he was seven, but he had promised that he would never end up like his father. Sadly he was close to being that as a gang member and a man who devoted many things to destruction. Not today, not to these people. Their dream was almost complete and he was not going to do what his boss was ordering him to do so as to put the fear of his group into their hearts. No the ‘Triad’ were today only going to take the money.
Shaz watched this guy as he went into some kind of trance, but after a couple of minutes this was getting embarrassing. “Um, hello! We have your money,” Sharon said again just wondering if the guy had died standing upright, when suddenly he woke up.
“Yeah, the doe.”
“Here take it. I trust we can have our workmen back now.” She handed him the money feeling it a waste just like throwing it into a bin, or fire, or something.
Chang took the envelope with a feeling of regret, regret for what? Was he going soft? No he cannot and will not let his emotions run the show. He was the number two guy because of his hard outlook on life. He was big headed, eager, tough and a guy who loved to ruin peoples lives. A guy who at the click of his fingers could make it rain on some guy because he spoke wrong. He was a man to be feared and he was just like his father! Just like him.
“I’ll tell you what. As you have been so kind in giving us, or should I say in taking out a protection policy with us. I’d like to do something to you.”
This was met with gasps of horror from the trio as Gordon yelled out, “oh no! Not my suit, don’t get blood on my suit, it’s hell to wash out, I’ll strip down to my underwear then you can smash me up!”
Bernard followed up with, “Shut up! What are you talking about? You might not survive the torture of having your fingers chopped off, or your eyes gouged out with a cold steel blade. Don’t worry about your suit a little ‘Stain Devil’ will get that out.”
Chang raised his hands and stopped the mad ramblings of the three as they flinched from his hand gesture. “Guys, guys, I don’t mean to smash you all up with knives and things. My favour, or gift is that I will help you get this dream of yours complete. I will instruct the builders to work double time to get it done. Night and day if necessary. Now what do you say about this offer?”
“I would say thank you, but just days will be fine.”
The voice came from behind Chang. Turning he saw two men who were at the pub last night. The smaller guy was Ben and his friend that renowned drunk Clive. It was Ben who had spoken and was going to again.
“Nice to see you again Chang.”
“Likewise.”
“What do you think of our place?”
“Very good, in fact it’s what moved me to make my offer.”
“Thank you all the same, but we don’t accept gifts off crooks who only pull things down and break things apart for the sake of fear.”
Chang’s rage was starting to come up into his heart, only for the reason that these words said here were true. Still it didn’t stop him from reacting and placing cold steel against this man’s neck.
Ben swallowed hard before saying, “oh, I forgot. Pull knives at people because they don’t like the truth, only because it can hurt far more than any flesh wound.”
After what was said had given way to silence, both men just stared each other out before Chang placed the knife away.
“Just be careful of that mouth, it could get you in trouble with my boss.”
Shaz who had been unable to move through all of this managed to find the words to say, “don’t worry he will!” before stepping in between the pair.
“Well lady and gents, it is time I left.” With that he walked out and headed for the entrance. Just before he exited he took another good look and muttered under his breath, “I’d like a piece of this.”
“Sorry boss, did you say take’a piece of this?”
Chang pulled himself out of it. “Nah Ron it was nothing, let’s just go.”

After the heavy mob had gone, all especially Sharon took a deep breath before she punched her husband.
“What the hell was that for?”
“You, trying to be a hero or what ever. I thought I was going to lose you.”
As Ben rubbed his arm he explained, “Chang may be a villain, but he would never kill someone, well not directly. He probably arrange for some poor sucker to bite the dust, he wouldn’t do it personally.”
“I just hope he don’t ask someone to bump you off, anyway how do you know he won’t do it himself?”
“It’s in his eyes Shaz. You can tell a lot from looking into people’s eyes.”
Sharon avoided looking into her husband’s eyes as she gave him her opinion, “that’s rubbish and you know it.”
“Oh yeah, I could tell you fancied me by the way your eyes looked at me.”
“Shaz looked up at him, “how so?”
“At first you wouldn’t look at me directly in the face, you always spoke to me looking else where. Then after a period of time you found the courage to look into my eyes and not long after that you popped the question.”
“Um, er, yeah, I get your point,” Shaz said as she felt the urge to go all shy like in the old days with him and look everywhere but at him. It was then she noticed something else. “What are you two doing?” She asked as Ben also noted that Gordon and Bernard were staring at each other’s eyes.
All Gordon could say was, “Um, nothing,” before changing the subject to, “that’s all very interesting, but what is the plan now?”
“That’s obvious. We get our club under way and operational as soon as possible. In that way you guy’s can recoup all the money paid out to the ‘Triad’.”
Sharon couldn’t agree more with Bernard’s line of thought. All seemed to agree to get back to work as soon as they could.
This turned out to be the very next morning as workers turned up extra early. It was very touching as each man personally apologised for not being able to work due to the so called strike. They had also clubbed together and purchased a large bunch of flowers which the foreman the one who looks like John Wayne presented to Shaz.
“Here you go me lady, just a little something from the lads. We wanted to say sorry for all the inconvenience caused by the strike.”
“I don’t really know what to say.”
The foreman did, “don’t say anything at all, just listen to the sound of many workers apologies.”
Shaz felt flustered at all of this attention and when you don’t know quite what to say, it is best to say nothing at all; she didn’t… “Well thank you again,” before looking at her husband and saying, “how come you never buy me flowers?”
It was like the whole room had centred their looks upon the man as he stammered out...“well, um, I think it’s time I got on, er now. Work calls.” He couldn’t get out quick enough and into that small stupid van, cooking stupid burgers for the masses. All the while the Coffee Club went on expanding.

 

COMPLETION? OR COMPLICATION?

 

Three or was it four weeks past and the Coffee Club became a complete state of mind, so said Gordon in a philosophical mood. There the three stood staring at the place which had already made a big dent in Sharon’s inheritance. Ben, Shaz and Gordon just looked at this big room with it’s gleaming marble pillars, floor and it’s décor. The stage had proper curtains, the spotlights were all functioning along with the aesthetic lighting, no burnouts, no fuses blowing in the night and no fire evacuations which had reaped havoc for a couple of weeks at awkward times. The bar stood proudly all decked out with many varieties of drink and polished glasses. Televisions hung from the ceiling showing the stage or anything you cared to run through the DVD if required. The state of the art sound equipment was installed and playing Sharon’s favourite artist Clannad, which Ben hated as he viewed a lot of their songs as something to commit suicide to, a point he was told to keep quiet about, as that was a sick frame of mind, or something.
The kitchen was finished along with the patio out back for the staff to have a breather in summer time, otherwise there was a small staff room. Outside the restaurant stood the reception. Almost opposite another two doors now led you to a coffee room which was decked out in dark stained furniture with many classy pictures on the walls. Two sliding doors on the right led directly to the restaurant and opposite was another big glass window with a couple big sliding patio type doors which allowed access to the street where several patio style tables and chairs. Going back out the way you came and facing reception, to the left was the completed toilets with disabled facilities. To the far right of the reception was a bigger corridor which led you to the stairs and a little further back was an expensive addition, a lift taking you upstairs in a jiffy. The lift had a pad which if you put a special code in could take you further up, or down to the wine cellar. For now all were only going up to the first floor.
The guest quarters which had originally about ten rooms now possessed about twenty as the original rooms had been cut down to size. Then again I was never good a maths as they had actually been cut down to a quarter of their size, Sharon had Forty rooms up here. No, actually thirty nine. What about the last room I hear you say, well my educated friend it is a storage cupboard for cleaning equipment.
Each room was still large enough to have a bathroom, many had either two singles or a double bed, there was even a honeymoon suite. Yes I know the second floor was going to be just the staff’s quarters, but Sharon being Sharon decided to lose half of it and make into a big penthouse type room. Ben and Sharon’s place hadn’t changed much, apart from the lift at this point. Now down to the basement stood a washroom and other laundry type facilities for keeping the rooms up and in pristine condition. Behind this stood the wine cellar which was now under half it’s original size. They had enough space right at the end to put another small room, this was Ben’s private hide out, his little shed for doing things he wanted to do in private.
After they had finished their tour, Gordon stood with them back in the great dining room, just waiting for the final verdict.
“Well Luvvies, what do you think?” He asked feeling a little scared at the response.
Ben looked at him as he sat down on one of the ergonomically designed chairs to aid comfort while eating your nosh. “It’s alright, I guess.”
Was that it? Is that all he could say after months of renovation, hard sweat, near heart attacks at missed deadlines, sleepless nights and terrible wind problems. All he could say was what he just said! What was said set off Gordon’s hands which became very clammy. He was about to wipe them upon his suit when he realised he was wearing a white suit and black finger marks wouldn’t go right. He decided to pace up and down as Clive walked in on the question and sat down.
“Hey Gordo, it looks good to me, then again I ain’t no expert.”
This just served to wind the poor guy up as he started to pace more fervently at this point as Shaz was well aware. To put his mind and body at ease she spoke, “Gordon it looks fine to me. It is radiant, brilliant, explosive in colour and vibrant with a sense of ambiance and a tough of real class of the renaissance period.”
Ben looked at Clive and muttered, “she said what now?” Clive just shrugged his shoulders. Sharon stood up and gave them a frown to be quiet and at this point Ben knew she was talking way above her station and hadn’t a clue what lines she was stringing together.
Gordon stopped pacing, “you really like it?”
“Of course I do you goof! It’s fantastic!” She ran over and gave the small guy a hug. “I could have never dreamed of anything so good.” Letting him go they both clapped their hands together and raised their ankles to knee height while letting out shouts of delight while Ben and Clive just sat their with looks out disapproval.
Thank goodness all were distracted when big Bernard came through the door with champagne and glasses.
“Hello folks, just brought this small bottle to celebrate the finish of a great project and the beginning of a great club.”
“Wow! Thank you Bernard.”
“Oooh champers!” Gordon shouted as he clapped his hands together in a mini applause at the man’s inner vision.
“Thanks mate, mine’s a large one and one for my friend too,” Ben shouted as he went to hand Clive one.
Clive raised his hands in objection, “No, I must excuse myself. I must continue the battle to give up the booze.”
“One glass won’t hurt,” Bernard replied as he shoved the drink in Clive’s direction.
“No, I…”
“Don’t be a spoil sport,” Shaz added to the weight of the argument.
Clive felt backed against the wall and once there he caved in, “okay just the one.”
The corked popped and there was more than one glass drank that afternoon. The group felt rather worse for ware as Shaz with a hangover went on a mission to the employment agencies for people, food suppliers and other things which required attention before the Coffee Club could get under way.

Deep in the heart of the Triad layer stood Chang. Here he was just waiting to go in to see his Godfather. It was always like this, you walked in through the front door and bang! It was just another delivery service of the courier kind. It’s a fully running business with packages coming in and others sorted to go out. This place was only meant to be a red herring in order to keep the filth off the scent. But to Chang’s chagrin it turned out to be so popular with the neighbourhood it now worked well and took nearly as much money as the drug factory down below. Well maybe not as much as that but enough to retire on and live a luxury life.
Here he sat in the main office as the camera opposite panned round to see who it was sitting in the chair. After about five minutes the door opposite clicked open by itself, this was the way down to the heart of the beast via a flight of stairs to a wall. There you faced another camera and this one watched before letting you in through the hidden entrance, that is after shouting your password to a hidden microphone. Once through you headed down again to another corridor, along past many other rooms which led to other parts of the gang’s lair. Finally you met a wall of armed heavies belonging to the man himself Chino. They were armed with allsorts and trained in many form of unarmed combat. He hated these mercenaries, though they wouldn’t touch him as he was so high up and had to respect him, though he knew they just paid lip service and false smiles. He had some loyalty stakes to cash in with this crew and today he may just have to do this. At present was a different day and Chang knew by the way he had been kept waiting that this was a test of nerves. No one ever saw Chino out of hours unless it was important. If not, you left it to the business meetings held regularly. Chang didn’t want other’s knowing of this idea, not just yet.
Time elapsed really slowly, was this a test of his patience? Was he today going to be gunned down for something he didn’t do? He had some of his men with him and a little gun fight might see him get out of there? By why would Chino do that? No paranoid thinking was required here, this was just a test and one given because of the nature of the call.
Chang’s thoughts were dispelled by the hissing open of the bombproof door and the stepping away of those mercenaries. He walked into a fine room all decked out in cold stainless steel. Everything from the desk, book shelves, computer station and the computer itself gave the appearance of a cold untouchable rock hard man. The only things not stainless were the chair made from leather and as it swung round it revealed a man all decked out in black leather. He looked like Alvin Stardust a singer of the nineteen seventies. Chang could imagine a spotlight coming from the roof and his boss bursting into song with ‘my coo ca chew’ or what ever that song was. He didn’t know really as he wasn’t born in the early part of that era. This brought a smile from Chang, only to have it wiped off.
“Why did you let them go without any harm? I have requested a beating and yet none are given. Three weeks worth of requests, none answered.” The voice was an almost low pitched whisper, though there was no mistaking the menace in it.
“Because my father, I can see there is no need to use violence at this time.”
“Why?”
“Because they paid up and have been showing deep respect for our organisation.”